Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
