it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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