3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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