I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
