i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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