while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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