I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
