who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
