Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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