Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize