you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
