please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
