Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
