Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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