I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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