Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
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still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
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