I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
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