If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Still dying that you shit outside
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
