To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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