Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
