I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog