Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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