im gay
i know
yea but for you.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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