I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
