i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Randomize
