did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize