nut hugger
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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