Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Randomize
