thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.