She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
