I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Randomize
