they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize