im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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