I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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