Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
