my vag is so smooth its legendary
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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