At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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