the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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