Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Its about making memories worth repressing
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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