I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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