I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Randomize