Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize