Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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