There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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