I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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