I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
