i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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