I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Did you just see the Batmobile???
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
