No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
