Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
